The previous weekend had been the Chinese New Year celebration. Not that it was a special New Year, but I guess every one of them was unique in its own ways.

Fundamentally, New Year is a time when people celebrated the coming of spring. And seeing that the majority of civilization thrived in the northern hemisphere, it is not surprising that the New Year is about the same time for many cultures regardless of the calendar used. Needless to say, the Chinese New Year began in China.

But here in Singapore, the significance of the changing of seasons is lost. It sort of explains why so many of the youngsters are finding the festival lacking. In fact, I learned that many do not even feel the need to celebrate.

Alas, the spring is beautiful. It represents life, renewal and hope. And is the perfect contrast to the cold bitter winter. Despite the lack of a seasonal change, I feel that it is even more vital for us to evoke the spring of the human spirit, before we are lost to a perpetual winter of the heart.

One a side note, I had shifted to a new flat. But due to the festive period, no house-warming had been planned.

And behold, the month of January is passing by. It is incredibly fast. The beginning of the year is usually peppered with the standard activities of planning for the entire year. Plans for the Gakkai, the Students Division and my students in school are up. These are 3 areas of my life where I genuinely felt a keen sense of responsibility towards. They are my immediate concerns.

But as I approached the 20th month since entering the workforce, I had also used the opportunity to seriously contemplate my career and my dreams.

I had not been a good student. Blessed with an above-average inclination towards academic subjects, I breezed through my Primary, Secondary and JC education without a hassle. While I may not be satisfied with the results I had gotten, I know that I had gotten them with minimum effort. I honestly did not study too hard for them and yet, still obtain decent grades.

This was to be my undoing. As a young man, I grew conceited and arrogant. And the lack of training in the art of studying causes me to struggle during my undergrad years. Nonchalantly, I would often remark that I was a “Sea-level” student as I average Cs throughout my varsity education. But the truth is, I was bothered about it deep down in my heart. I would love to have study harder, but I did not and regretted badly.

As I pursue a career in education, the significance of studying continued to laminate my consciousness and it was becoming glaring. I am now determined to put my attitudes towards studying back on track. I hereby promise to myself that I will eventually pursue further studies. If condition permits, I would go beyond Masters and obtain a Doctorate degree.

I will always be working in the field of education, a vow I had made to my mentor to support his vision of Soka Education. This I will not waver. Hence, my goal for the next 5 years will be to complete my bond with MOE and explore the possibility to read the Masters of Education or Philosophy or other related subjects. A doctorate will be my goal for the next 10 years.

There! I had finally put it down in black and white. I am determined to savior the joy of studying and demonstrate the truth meaning of education through my very own example and life experience.

I had always enjoyed the study of philosophies and religions. I believed that one of the greatest joys of humanity is the exploration of our spirituality. And this week, I began my spiritual journey for the year.

I last read the bible when I was in the JC. Having been educated in mission schools in my younger days, I was already rather familiar with the stories within. But I was young then. It is true that as we mature, re-reading the same materials brings about different sensation.

I remembered being challenged to read the bible again when I was an undergrad. But the September 11 incident happened and I chose to study the Koran instead. I still have my copy of Koran with me. It was one of my favorite books. But this year, I decided to re-read the bible.

I had just completed the first book on Genesis. It did bring new insights and perspectives on the Garden of Eden and the well-loved story on Noah and his Ark. Incidentally, I had also caught an interesting documentary exploring the legends and myth behind the adventures of Moses. This is going to be a good month for studying.

Unlike the teachings of the People of the Books, Buddhism does not have a definitive text that claimed to be absolute. One of the main reasons is because the focus on Buddhism is not on definitions. It is less concern on the cause of our world, but rather, it is focused entirely on the eradication of human sufferings.

At the founding of Buddhism, Brahmanism that had until then dominated Indian spiritual life had grown rigid and formalized. One of the best examples of this is the chaste system which many people who read about ancient Indian are very familiar with. There was too much importance attached to ceremonies that the inner cultivation of the self is neglected. The earliest Buddhist text, which formed the bulk of Hinayana Buddhism rose as a powerful protest to this trend.

“People’s nobility is determined not by the level of their birth, but their actions.”

However, the emphasis on self-reliance ultimately became distorted as well. The preoccupation with strict practice resulted in exaggerated importance on those who entered monastic life. This led the clergy into developing a condescending attitude towards the laity, causing an unhealthy divide.

Mahayana Buddhism then arose to counter such discriminatory views in order to revive the humanism which Shakyamuni originally espoused. This school placed the emphasis on the seeking spirit for the way or enlightenment. However, excessive emphasis of this point tended to promote the view that Buddhism is too difficult for ordinary people to practice. It was at this time that incredible metaphors of Buddhas with supernatural abilities are found in the literature. This resulted in the Lotus Sutra being the most bizarre of them all. However, implicitly embedded in the depths of the Lotus Sutra, is the core of the philosophy known as Buddhism.

I should share on that another time. For now, my readings on the history of the Christian faith triggered my own rumblings of the history of Buddhism. Do pardon me on that account.

Happy Hari Raya Haji!!!

Religious Life:

I have more or less maintained my one hour of daimoku per day. Not a bad accomplishment. But I had wanted to dedicate 10 minutes of chanting for each prayers I’d set. Counting my prayers set for the year 2006…

• I set 2 prayers for my Chapter and District
• I set 2 prayers for the Students Division
• I set 2 prayers for my students in MFSS
• I set 1 private and personal prayer for myself

That adds to 7!!! I am still behind by 10 minutes each day. Got to try harder.

Spiritual Life:

I’m rather excited about the District Leaders Kenshu and the IIC R&R for the next 2 weekends. A great opportunity to strengthen myself spiritually and work on my Human Revolution. I'm learning a lot as I prepares for these events. Cheers!

I had also decided to participate in this year’s NDP. Should be a great year ahead.

Work Life:

I am still enjoying my career choice thus far. With each passing week, my nervousness and “stage-fright” when standing in front of a classful of students diminishes, this can only be good news. I think my pedagogy is improving.

I need to work on improving my handling of CCA though. I felt that I did not do a good job in that respect. Need to reflect on it. The school’s website needs updating too.

I have been assigned the role of the department’s resource manager. It is hard work. But I’ll do well for it. I had also been robed into the DATA committee and given the responsibility to be in-charge of the Alternative Assessment Project. This is only the beginning I guessed. I finally lost the feeling of being a “trainee” and is totally plunged into the thick of action.

Personal Life:

Shifting to my new flat by CNY. I think that would be the main highlight for now. I realized that the holiday festive season is bad for my weight, must really be more discipline in watching my weight.

Finally, I still miss her occasionally. I seriously need to move on.

我以为已经过去了。不然。

在茫茫人海中，我一直在寻找她的踪影。好想和她握一握手，说声‘新年快乐’，由衷的祝福她。其实心好像早就平伏了，我真的以为是这样，直到又见到她的容颜，心又澎湃、沸腾起来了。思绪都被打乱了。我明白了。我真地了解自身的‘一害’了。

先生，我一定要克服心魔，达成人间革命。我发誓，定要成为让您骄傲的弟子。我的恩师，让我祝福您生日快乐。我一定会成长。请您放心。

I have a kind of certain affection for Upper Serangoon Road. To be honest, it was not an exceptional road. But it just happened to be the road that I traveled most along all through my childhood. And many times, I did it alone. Even from the time when I was in primary school, I would walk from one end of that road to the other whenever I wanted some quiet time alone.

And I did just that minutes from the New Year. Many thoughts.

The streets were quiet. The crowds were elsewhere welcoming the New Year. But along the familiar Upper Serangoon Road, I saw the real world.

I saw a couple smiling at each other
I saw a police car announcing their presence with flashing lights
I saw force enforcers taking notes
I saw a youth looking forlorn outside a school’s gate
I saw men dressed in strange robes trying to look important
I saw a procession of men unsure of whom they are
I saw an ambulance by a funfair full of children
I saw two truckers sharing a can of beer
I saw an illuminating fire in the open field unmanned

Nine phenomenons which I would usually not noticed. I saw them all today. And then I made my New Year Resolutions. I had always been supportive of the idea of making resolutions, but I had never ever been this serious.

Yes. I am undergoing a major spiritual and mental change. I will achieve my human revolution. I am ready for the 2006: The Year of Youth and Dynamic Growth.